Yeah, so my boyfriend and I were coming out of our Student Union and there was a man about to throw a microwave into a lorry full of trash. My boyfriend's like
"a microwave, we'll have that!"
Man- "yeah, ok"
Me- "does it work?"
Man- "probably"
Me- "cool, thanks!" *takes microwave*

Awesomes :-)

We were on the way to a shop, so we had to take the microwave there, lol. Then our religion and theology lecture, in a theatre with plug sockets! So we had it on a chair next to us and plugged it in to see if it was working, lol. It was- score :-)
We asked around if anyone had anything needed warming up, but they didn't :-( I swear, if we had had microwave popcorn on us in that lecture it would have been a fantastic moment :-D

Then my boyfriend was off to do things so I was left to take it home on the bus, lol. Carrying it to the bus stop was tricky enough, then sorting out my oyster card... I was considering just using the timer to make the "ping" noise and claim it was the oyster card beep :-D
Also the plate and stuff were crashing around inside which made a few people look at me oddly, but I assured them it was ok :-)

So today I managed to download a virus that screwed up my entire laptop, so had to wipe the poor computer and start again *sniffle*

I was very bored whilst that was happening, so decided to do some baking... purchased cake ingredients from the foreign shop at the end of the road, and the (possibly greek) man that I can't understand very well asked me for a piece of cake, which I said he could have, and if my friend and I were chefs, to which we said we weren't. Lol.

So I made a victoria sponge with my friend, who was coming up with a theory that if we took him cake he'd love us and ask me to marry his son... ok, we were high on sugar. But anyway, we took him a piece :-) he was very pleased, and we told him we wanted to buy cheese (as I now had a plan to make cheese straws) and he was like "i have very nice cheese for you! good price" and took us over to the cheese counter and sold us a block of Feta.
my friend *whispers*"is this the cheese we need?"
me "i dont know..."

Still I bought it, not wanting to offend him, and we left, being greeted by the younger guy in the shop- "goodbye ladies"
So maybe I can marry his son after all.

Then we went to a different shop to buy the cheese I actually needed, my friend in tears from laughing.

So my phone is so broken that trying to use it is quite like how I imagine it would be if you were on acid... half the screen is black and the rest has pretty multicoloured lines all over it. That or my phone's mum mated with a kaleidoscope.

Anyhow, becuase of my pitiful situation my brother gave me his old one. Without thinking to delete anything on it. I scroll through his pictures- mostly of our pet dogs- and come across one of my brothers gf topless, oops!

So I decided I should go downstairs and tell him. This is slightly thwarted by my brother actually being downstairs with his girlfriend. Hahaha!
I told him all his files were still on it, and he asked to have a look... I gave him it and he deleted the gf pic and gave it back to me, saying he didnt want anything and I could delete the rest. Lol.

Got my OTHER nipple pierced :)

Got my nipple pierced!

Today my lunch was rudely interrupted by a one-eyed dog that drank all my drink.

Later in a misguided attempt to find a shortcut home from the supermarket, i got sucked into a riverbed up to my thighs indiana jones-style; managed to escape by grabbing an overhanging branch though!

having accompanied to my friend to a gay club for his birthday, i spent a good half-hour making out with a lesbian in a wheelchair.

(i have a boyfriend)

Phoning your little sister becuase you're slightly drunk and not wanting to write your research essay...
To be told her and her friend have broken a tap and there is a leak of hot water...
And having to explain to them how to isolate and cut off a water supply over the phone, whilst slightly inebriated :-)

Everyone here works far too hard for first-year exams, no-one is eating or sleeping properly either (no time!!) so everyones slowly going insane.

My incredibly smart friend can answer any technical question you throw at him, but the simple things are starting to confuse him:

"The influenza virus, what does that cause?"
"Rectal carcinoma, where's that?"
"What do you use a sigmoidoscope to look at?" (sigmoid colon)

I advised him to think before he asked any more questions. He went and had a nap. Lol.


My other friend is hilarious on an entirely different level... today she went to rest her head on a table after some reading notes, misjudged, and bashed her face into it!
We couldn't believe it happened, that's how funny it was!

"SHOES equal BIKE!
TROUSERS equal BIKE!

...look, ill draw you a Venn diagram..."

ive just glued the ring and pinky fingers on my left hand together with superglue.

theyre proper stuck

im amused :-)

this is the first time its lasted more than 5 minutes actually, normally im too sweaty or something i guess.

ok its itching now, ill pull it off.

Today my dad gave me a notebook that says "i used to be a juice carton"

Weird enough on it's own, but he'd already got me one that day when we were in town... (becuase i left mine at uni!)

In a cocktail bar, I managed to order a "multiple screaming orgasm" and keep a straight face!

Had my birthday party tonight, lots of food in my room, this all got moved so we could dance... due to the wide variety of guests, we danced to everything from r n b to bhangra to heavy metal!

Wandering around a pathology museum humming to yourself the song "the humans are dead"...

tried to cook curry, managed to turn it into some kind of curry stew...
too much water and carrots...

tasted good though :-)

me and my friend made pizza at 1am, i had plain margherita ones...
we spiced them up with bacon, garlic and soy sauce...
it actually wasn't half bad.

these are the basic ingredients in all of my friend's food... i asked if this makes all his food taste the same...
"yes, but it all tastes like sex, so its ok"

and there you have it.

drank an entire bottle of vodka.

drank half, wandered home collecting a "strictly no admittance" sticker on the way... fell asleep on my bed at 9pm, got dragged to the student bar, had a few drinks there, wandered back, drank with friend in halls and random lesbians, put my shoes in the washing machine? presented my friend with a tampon who then attacked my other friend with it, unfortunately chose this time to text my boyfriend.

lol, i was later on told i was also asking the guy my friend likes if he has a penis...

So today I was feeling a little low.

To cheer myself up, I found random clothing in the back of my wardrobe and put it on whilst dancing to loud music... ive managed to find a smart pink skirt with paisley patterns, and a tight smart black top, so i look kinda like a funky secretary.
Topped it off with a sequinned eye-mask and headed to the laundrette to get my laundry done :-)